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Has Your Man Lost His Get UP and Go?

While there's no getting away from inevitable changes - an estimated 38 per cent of British men in their 60s suffer from erectile dysfunction - it's not all bad news.

According to a new sex survey by Dr Miriam Stoppard, erection problems don't mean the end of a man's sex life, especially if he's prepared to trust his two best allies - his partner and his GP. "Three quarters of the women in our survey were very sympathetic to their partners and, as sex means so much to them, will help sort out sex difficulties," says Miriam.

There are lots of solutions and he shouldn't be embarrassed to get it checked out. His doctor really will have seen it all before and - more importantly - it can be a sign of more serious health problems.

Why it happens

THE link between sex problems and ageing is far greater for men than women. Relate sex therapist Denise Knowles says: "A lot of men suffer from what I call the ageing penis syndrome, which means their erections aren't as strong as they'd like them to be."

Here are some of the reasons...

HORMONE LEVELS Lower testosterone levels are part of the ageing process for men. Testosterone has a big impact on a man's sex drive. Levels in the body reach a peak between the ages of 20 and 30, after which they gradually decline.

According to Dr Duncan Gold, a consultant hormone specialist at Gold Cross Medical Services in London, around half all men aged 50 or more have low levels of testosterone, causing tiredness, lack of energy, loss of libido and erection problems.

UNDERLYING PROBLEMS Erectile dysfunction can be an early warning sign for diabetes or heart disease. These conditions affect the circulation, reducing blood flow to the penis.

DRUGS Blood pressure drugs and antidepressants can cause erection problems, so a man should ask his doctor for advice if this may be the cause. It could be as simple as switching tablets or changing the dose.

LIFESTYLE Smoking can cause erectile dysfunction. According to doctors, it causes a build-up of fatty deposits in the arteries, affecting blood flow - a main requirement for a healthy erection. Drinking too much can also have a detrimental effect as it blocks the nerves necessary for an erection.

WORRY If a man becomes preoccupied with his performance, it may interfere with his ability to get an erection and put him off trying.

Get him to talk

According to our survey, the majority of mature women don't feel embarrassed to talk about sex problems such as erectile dysfunction with their partners. In fact, 77 per cent said they'd help their man overcome any problems he was having with his sex drive.

"With any sexual difficulty, a couple need to sit down and talk," says Denise. "If they don't, what often happens is the man withdraws from sex and his partner starts feeling unattractive.

"You could say something like 'We're not making love as often as we used to and I'm feeling upset about it - how do you feel?"

Next, your partner should see his GP. Even if he doesn't want medical treatment, it's still important to rule out more serious conditions.

Christine Webber, psychotherapist and relationships counsellor, says: "Men are often reluctant to go to the doctor so any encouragement a woman can offer her partner to seek help is worthwhile. After all, why would you ignore something that might possibly shorten your life if you don't get it fixed?"

Seek solutions

These days, at least where older women are concerned, there's no shame in seeking medical help for sex problems. More than two-thirds of those who took part in our survey say they'd want their partner to try a treatment if he had difficulty maintaining an erection. See Miriam's view, right, for what's on offer.

Explore alternatives

Once you talk about it, you can start exploring other ways of making love, which lifts the pressure from your partner.

"It's a myth that you've got to have a strong erection in order to make love," says Denise. "And while you may have had sex more often years ago, when you get older, the intimacy becomes more sensual than sexual.

"You just have to recognise that sex changes. Reassure him that it's a perfectly natural part of the ageing progress and you're ok with it.'

And our survey found that older women find other things that are just as fulfilling as sex, including having a romantic dinner and holding hands.

Dr Miriam's view

ALL men experience erection problems at some point. But while in young men erectile dysfunction (ED) is usually transient and erections soon return to normal, the problem can become ever present in older men.

The good news is, ED needn't mean the end of a man's enjoyment of sex. And my survey shows that his partner can do a lot to help. Women are sensitive to their partner losing confidence because of ED. Two-thirds of mature women aren't embarrassed to talk about their partner's sexual needs or to discuss ED and its implications.

In fact, they'd encourage their partner to go to the doctor to try a treatment for ED.

In this way, they're doing their partners a real service in protecting their long-term wellbeing, as ED can be an early warning sign for serious health problems.

Drugs do work

Eight out of 10 of our women are aware that conditions such as heart disease and diabetes can often go undetected and feel it's crucial women encourage a partner with ED to see a doctor. Only one in 10 would be embarrassed if their partner used a treatment for ED.

There are several successful treatments available, even for men with diabetes and arterial disease. Powerful drugs such as Levitra and Viagra help men with ED. But another, called Cialis, can make men feel normal again and restore their sexual confidence, too. Cialis lasts up to 36 hours so sex can be relaxed and spontaneous.

So today's mature, sympathetic, sexy woman can save her partner's life and their sex lives, too.

Source: http://www.mirror.co.uk/